Law and Order:SCU

1st crime scene investigator: “So. What happened here?”
2nd crime scene investigator: “Well, it looks like we have a murder suicide.”
1st crime scene investigator: “But it’s just the one fat guy, right?”
2nd crime scene investigator: “Yeah, but it looks like he killed his self with coffee. Overstimulation. Apparently the guy could see in the future for a few minutes. Poor bastard forgot that coffee was a diarrhetic.”
1st crime scene investigator: “yeah. Looks like the crime scene cleaners are going to be here for a while.”
2nd crime scene investigator: “Yep. It’s a real mess. I don’t get paid enough for this … well you know.”
1st crime scene investigator: “Funny. So, his heart just exploded, huh?”
2nd crime scene investigator: “yep. He started doing work at his computer this morning with a Starbucks Venti Café Americano, even though he had already had a half pot of coffee before that. He went to Starbucks early to try to do something nice for his wife and 17 year old daughter. His mistake; also getting a coffee.”
1st crime scene investigator: “Café Americano?”
2nd crime scene investigator: “You betcha. Poor guy raced home, handed the women their coffees, and went upstairs to work. He started typing so fast on work and something he called,” investigator looks at his notepad, “according to his wife, ‘A therapeutic blog’. The caffeine hit his frontal lobe so fast that he could actually see in the future for a few minutes.”
1st crime scene investigator: “That explains why he’s naked.”
2nd crime scene investigator: “Does it? Seems like a bit of a perve to me. I mean, why would you want someone to find you like this?”
1st crime scene investigator: “Well apparently he got really sweaty because of the rush of caffeine. That explains the nakedness.”
2nd crime scene investigator: “if you say so. It just seems a little odd to me. He had so much to live for. He was obviously intelligent. I mean,he invented cold fusion before his heart exploded and passed through his bowels. He just couldn’t see the fact that his blood had been replaced with coffee. Ironic, isn’t it?”
1st crime scene investigator: “Yeah. Poor Bastard.”