Cauliflower Ice Cubes

You ever have to poop so bad you could actually taste peanuts? You know the kind. The kind where you actually hallucinate about creamed corn? Yeah, me neither. Not anymore anyway. You know what else? Pooping in an airport is gross. You know what else is gross? Sitting on a warm airport toilet seat or any warm toilet seat for that matter. That and having a stall door that won't close or having a guy peek thru the opening of the door that won't close and say "anybody in there?" I felt like a U.S. Senator. What on earth did I eat you ask? You'd think it was a hot chocolate made up of Ex Lax chocolates. Or like I drank a tonic made entirely of Bean juice with Cauliflower Ice Cubes. This is the first time I've ever had dry heaves down there.


Something else and completely not related: I'm almost ok with the back of my bald head looking like a package of ball park franks when I look up. I'm almost ok with having to keep "Fat Pants" after long trips when I've been less than good with my eating. Almost; but I'm not.

Here's 3 or 4 phrases that made me giggle today during my staff meeting.
1. "He didn't want to burn Political Capital."
2. "It's really just about entrainment and mortality."
3. "There could have been 11 fishkills."
4. My "friend's" boss is from India, each time he says "Vessel" he exchanges the "V" with a "W".
"How many Wessels do they need to inspect?" (My three year old has the same issue).
"Vee are going to eat at Vataburger because it is so wery inexpensive." It's kinda like having Bela Lugosi run your staff meeting, "I vant to Drink you Bluhd!", so says my friend.

I was reading Envireauxmental Law Posts today because of work. Here are six things that made me laugh.
1. Pasteurized Milk Ordinance-an EPA proposed rule exempting Milk from spill regulations.
2. Alaska Plans to Sue Agencies Over Decision To List Cook Inlet Beluga Whale Under Act- Quote from an activist, Brendan Cummings, oceans program director for the Center for Biological Diversity, said in a Jan. 14 news release. “Governor Palin must be suffering from an Ahab complex; she has an irrational obsession with driving the white whale extinct.”
3. Environmental Groups Sue EPA Over Rule Exempting Farms From Emissions Reporting- The coalition which includes the Sierra Club stated that farms, “generate a massive amount of urine and feces” and “This waste is known to release high levels of toxic pollutants into the air such as ammonia and hydrogen sulfide,” Bubba Shane Boudreaux could not be immediately reached for comment, but did say in an earlier press release that the suit was, “BS.”
4. Gypsum Waste at TVA Power Plant In Alabama Spills Into Nearby Creek-This is the definition of irony. “Most of the material, which is generated from an air pollution control device at the coal-powered electric plant”
5. EPA Releases high-efficiency flushing Criteria for Urinals-Enough said. I really don’t need to add a quote here do I? Here’s a fake one, EPA tells Turlet manufacturer, “Urine big trouble now mister!”
6. Arkansas Register (Woo Pig!)- November 4, 2008 Rule Adoption-Arkansas Pest Control Law, “Splatter Batter Matters.” (made that last part up.)

Friday night was my daughters Homecoming game. I listened to part of it on the radio. The announcers name was, and I'm not kidding, TurtleDog Leiberman. Isn't that just a touch of precious?Can't you just see ole TurtleDog at a cocktail party and when one of the snooty guests asks, "So Is TurtleDog your Christian name?" His reply might be, "No ma'am. TurtleDog is my nickname. GatorPuss is what's on muh Birthin' Record.";)